Brad Pitt sleeps alone

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Not only is the happiest couple in the world getting married, they are sleeping in separate beds. According to “reliable sources” Brad is aging backwards and Angelina keeps waking up in cold sweats thinking she is sleeping with a young boy. The kids are unaware of the situation and are too distracted by a simple game of tag because they are all saying “You’re it!” in different languages.

Pink called Kanye West, ‘A waste of skin’

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There’s a first for everything, and for once I half agree with Pink. She hates Kanye West, and loves PETA. I too hate Kanye West, but hate PETA -one outta two ain’t bad. They both attended some fashion show and The SUN reported Pink saying,

“I was at STELLA McCARTNEY’s Paris fashion show with the vice president of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, PAUL McCARTNEY and Kanye West.
“The entire time Kanye is going, ‘They need more fur in this show’. He just wouldn’t shut up about how he loved fur. I mean, he’s saying this to me, the PETA guy and Paul McCartney! I was just so grossed out by him. I’m like, ‘You’re an idiot!’
“There are so many people who I think are a waste of skin and he’s up there. I should wear him. Go on, donate yourself Kanye. People can wear your fur.”

Snap.

QUITTERS.

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Heidi and Spencer finished only one episode of ‘I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here!’, and then quit, like little bitches. TMZ reports,

A source close to production tells TMZ the “Hills” duo walked off the set for good after the live portion of last night’s show. It is unclear how the show will handle their leaving on tonight’s episode.

They thought the show they signed up for was called, ‘I’m a Douchebag…Get Me more Ed Hardy gear!’ The second they realized no Ed Hardy or Affliction shirts were being given away as prizes, they went ape-shit and stormed off the set, tripping over their clownshoes.

Megan Fox won’t do ‘Wonderwoman’ but Lara Croft is OK

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John:
Megan Fox won’t do Wonderwoman because she claims, “I’d be a lame superhero.” But she has no problem being Lara Croft in the upcoming Tomb Raider installment. Can somebody explain to me the difference between Wonderwoman and Lara Croft? Cause it sounds about the same if you know what I mean.

Yep, that’s Britney Spears

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John:
It’s official, Britney Spears is hot again. There were times before when I was like ’she’s looking better. I might hit that drunk.’ But now I’m all like, ‘She’s hot again. Officially.’ And since my word is the beginning and end of trading on Wall Street, it’s pretty much law. So welcome back, Britney. I’d hit it.