Derober

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Photo courtesy of Perez Hilton

Dee:
The former ‘West Wing‘ star went to the Beverly Center yesterday with a friend. For all you non-Californians out there, people are allowed to bring their toy dogs to the mall. Shoppers are also allowed to bring their small toy people into the mall as well just as long as the toy people don’t get out at bite the shoppers or other toy dogs.

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Dee:
Jessica Alba gave Elle magazine an earful on the paparazzi in this month’s issue:

“[The paparazzi are] F#*@ers! They do this [follow] to me every day. And every day there’s no story. I’m not doing drugs. I’m not running over people. I’m not going to clubs. I’m not dating anyone famous. I’m not doing anything interesting! I don’t get it. I’m the most boring chick ever.”

John:
HOWEVER, In a recent interview, Jessica claims she wants to be known as a tough girl. Jessica says, “Underneath I’d prefer to be known for something else, like being tough or being smart.” Alba doesn’t stop there. She says, “I’d rather slay a guy with my fists than my looks.” Do you want to be boring or a man-slayer, Jess? You can’t be both. Take a long look in the mirror and reflect. Or roll your mouse over this here picture.

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Photo courtesy of egotastic.com

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Location: NY
Place: Houston’s Restaurant on 54th and 3rd
Storyteller: Michael O.

“I don’t work at Houston’s anymore so here goes. One day, our greeter got a call from Christina’s people saying she was coming in. When she got there, the manager freaked out and told me I had the honor of waiting on her. I could have cared less, I’m not impressed by celebrities because I consider myself to be a star. Continue Reading: Exclusive: Is X-Tina a good tipper? Her waiter for 2 years tells all.

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Dee:
Britney Spears has returned home from her padded hotel. She’s said to be resting, but still bat-shit crazy.
John:
We can’t wait to see what happens next in this soap popera.

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John:
A stand-up-off is brewing at the Laugh Factory. Last month Dave Chappelle took the stage for 6 hours and 12 minutes without a pause, setting the world laugh endurance record. Not to be outdone, Dane Cook made the Laugh Factory into a bed and breakfast (emphasis on bed) for 7 hours last Tuesday, breaking Chappell’s newly-minted record. I have a better idea, why don’t the two just ’stand-up’ next to each other, unzip their pants, and see whose is bigger. Problem solved. Victory, Dave Chappelle.

UNRELATED AWESOMENESS: Keeley Hazell, FHM’s #3 ‘Sexiest on the planet’, just posed nude here.

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