Bob ‘The Bitch’:
For those who were stuck at work over Easter yesterday, this is for you. Perhaps the most gorgeous blond bombshell ever, Pamela Anderson was out with ex-hubby Tommy Lee and their invisible, nameless kid. Pamela may be getting up there on age but by God she still has the goods. The sweet nectar that are her boobs make remember that I’m not too old to dream. I’m always just one click away from Heaven, and that’s more than some countries can say. For that I am thankful.
Darby Gunpowder:
Grab your guns, poison darts, reapers, whatever blunt objects you can get ahold of -it’s rabbit season. Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag were spotted out and about by their paid photographer sporting bunny ears, pastels and what appears to be a rental-kid. They were probably talking about how aces the weather on fantasy island is this time of year.
Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Yesterday in what stock analysts are calling the worst Jessica Alba photo shoot on record, Alba and fiance Cash Warren bored us all to tears. The two were spotted hugging, kissing, playing Scrabble, and watching water evaporate on a Malibu beach. If that wasn’t bad enough, Jessica Alba wore the most unrevealing dehydrated piss colored ensemble I’ve ever seen. For those of you who feel you’ve been cheated by this ‘Alba Beach photo shoot’, this after photo is for you. Enjoy.
John:
A combination of bad reviews and Wilson’s off-screen problems sent Drillbit Taylor to the bottom of this weekends box office with only a $10M opening. The Apatow production got zero McLovin’ from critics. My favorite review from John Biefuss read, “Drillbit is to Judd Apatow as ‘Harry and the Hendersons’ is to Steven Spielberg.