Derober

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Darby Gunpowder:
I’m sure Edward Norton will play a compelling and believable Hulk, but if i had my way, the Gov’na himself would play the green beast. Speaking of green Beasts, my buddy Doug’s sister is whore.
I digress, this post has nothing to do with anything gossip related, but I do like to give credit where credit is due. The above photo of the Hulk was dreamed up by an artist by the name is Jonas, and he’s a badass. Check out his website here.

PS -In case you were wondering, yes, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s balls are THAT small.

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John:
A simple, “Can I motorboat your bitch please” would have sufficed. Instead this dude sticks his fat dumb head into a world of pain. And, yes, I can summon a bottle of Milwaukee’s Best from the heavens at my will.

Audrina is on the set of her new film The Reef. Let’s face it, the movie is going to be almost unwatchable. In fact, The Reef spelled backwards is Strait to DVD. True story.

Also, if you get a minute, Karina Smirnoff’s top popped off today. Bam!

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Yeah, Boba and Audrina go out for tea and sex every Sunday. Boba never calls back. No woman can cage the Fett. It’s like catching a seal lathered in butter.

Click here to see what I am doing tonight

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John:
Christina Aguilera has been suppering across LA the past couple days and she aint shy. Those things honestly look like they might pop at any moment.
You might be wondering, ‘Why Oscar the Grouch?’ It’s because Oscar the Grouch got a raw deal. You live out your life in a garbage can and see how giddy it makes you.  Oscar was a delight compared to how I’d act if I was mashed in a can. I’d probably try to find the nearest living thing and kill it. So Oscar gets the boobs today. God bless you Oscar and God bless the Children’s Television Workshop.

For all ‘Dress Diving’ episodes, click here.

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Darby Gunpowder:
Thanks to CampusSqueeze for compiling the list of their top 64. Their site kept crashing due to the Digg Effect, so we made a mirror and added a few movies that didn’t make their list…

69. The Usual Suspects

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Why It’s On The List:

Spacey mentally thrashes the police by creating a bullsh*t story that only a man could pull off. A mental beatdown of epic proportions.

Memorable Man Quote:

Verbal: The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.

Click here her to view entire list Continue Reading: The 69 Manliest Movies to Ever Made

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Darby Gunpowder:
Once upon a time, a rogue cupid was on the loose shooting hot chicks with bat-shit laced arrows that started an epidemic called: HCWD (aka hot-chicks-with-douchebags). Historians have pinpointed the source of this wicked outbreak when Shania Twain married Mutt Lang that fateful day in December, 14 years ago. This event, paired with Shania’s super stardom, seemed to open the floodgates for hot chicks everywhere to share sacred sex with douchebags near and far. Alas, an anonymous vigilante, probably Daniel Craig, finally captured the evil cupid and executed him with VX Gas. As if the spell had magically lifted, Shania woke up one morning next to Father Time and simply walked out, proclaiming, “That don’t impress me much.” Boom. Done.
Check out the video below of Shania walking out on Mutt. Incredible!

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Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Angelina Jolie is having twins. Imagine what Brad must be going through. Kids keep dropping off at his doorstep like flies to dog sh@t and Angelina expects him to take care of them. Brad rants for a while and then realizes there’s no sense dealing with a woman that uses kids as currency. She gets a great discount because of her fame. At some point Brad has to put his foot down and say that’s enough. The day you can’t pronounce fifty percent of your children’s names is the day you stop adopting. That being said, Angie has already discussed plans to adopt more children in more countries. Brad failed to comment. Angie likes it that way. She also loves wearing pants

For more Angie baby x-rays and more.

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