Derober

Darby Gunpowder:
My dream has come true: Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag endorse Ed Hardy. Why is this a dream come true you ask??
Ed Hardy is the most horrific clothing line ever regurgitated by mankind (I have been to jail 17 times for hulking loogies on 17 separate strangers on the street wearing urban Hardy-clown suits). And Heidi Mantag and Spencer Pratt are the most horrific human beings ever regurgitated by their shameful parents. My logic: since everyone, including David Letterman, hates Prattag, everyone will now boycott Ed hardy. The combination is equivalent to crossing the streams in Ghostbusters.

Speaking of guns, Pratt and Montag are collecting firearms. According to thesuperficial,

“The couple visited the Martin B. Retting store in Culver City, Calif., on June 7 and spent more than $10,000 on guns to arm themselves. They purchased two Benelli semiautomatic M4 tactical shotguns, two Wilson close quarter combat .45-caliber pistols and one Scout semiautomatic rifle. “They wanted the exact guns that the U.S. Delta Force uses,” a friend explains. “Spencer wants to be prepared for anything.”

PS. If you are wearing Ed Hardy while reading this, you are banned from Derober.com for life. Please leave now and go hang out with Spencer Pratt. Odds are, you’ll both be shot by accidental discharge.