Derober

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John:
Swiss Supermodel Michelle Hunziker can’t figure out if she’s playing baseball or soccer. And that’s OK. Frankly, I don’t care if she can’t add or subtract.  It’s all about the title really. Most people are Mr. or Mrs. but Swiss Supermodel is so much better. But that’s just my opinion and the opinion of the entire free world. So take it with a grain of salt.

Comments (2)

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Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Yep, it’s official…I don’t give a shit. Fake, real, makes no difference to me. As a general rule of thumb if I can plant half of my head in between a rack I’m happy. Like a kid in a tit-candy store. I will admit I’ve had my suspicions for the past year that Christina Aguilera did in fact get a boob job. People laugh and tell me that boobs just expand a little during the pregnancy. Ok, a little, fine. But those puppies grew like the Grinch’s heart. They mutated like a turtle in radioactive goo. Furthermore, she gave birth sometime ago now and those knockers don’t look to be going anywhere soon. C’mon X-Tina, fess up, you had breast implants put in while pregnant so you could have an excuse for why they’re so big. It’s ok, I won’t judge you. I would never frown upon a pair of tits that could suffocate a small army.

Comments (2)

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Darby Gunpowder:
Now that football is no longer in the way for Tom Brady, he can devote his entire schedule to the Hollywood lifestyle with now breadwinner Giselle. Bring on the goats! I can see it now, Tom Brady is the next Spencer Pratt. A no talent hack who is famous for nothing. And since Brady will be doing nothing this year, he’s a prime candidate. He’ll succumb to the Remora lifestyle feeding off Giselle’s crumbs, much like Spencer feeds off Heidi’s crabs. We’ll know when the transformation is complete when Tom is seen wearing douchy Ed Hardy clothes from head to knee.

Comments (3)

That’s Sophie Monk in a bikini there (DoubleViking)
Celebrities who have stripped for a cause (Asylum)
Abbie Raytay gets breast implants (BustedCoverage)
Playboy’s Girls Next Door doing what they do best (DirtyRotten)
Elizabeth Hurley is hot as shit….still (On205th)
I saw this photo and I laughed my ass off (TastyBooze)
Fast and Furious 4 trailer. Boom. (Cuzoogle)
Quite possibly the grossest Minnie Driver photo I’ve ever seen (Warship)
Paris Hilton’s screen test is amazing. That was a joke (BedHead)
All the VMA coverage you need (Pink)

Comment (0)

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John:
Kristen Bell and her ward, Dax, went to the beach to make PDA for the cameras. I’m just spinnin’ my wheels here but does Dax have a tattoo of a barfing dolphin on his arm? It’s probably not but I have a rule of thumb: If you have a tattoo that, from a distance, looks like a barfing dolphin, you don’t deserve to date Kristen Bell. That’s pretty much my only rule and I stick to it with military-like devotion.

Photo credit = Egotastic

Comments (4)