Derober

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Bob ‘The Bitch’:
You know it’s times like this that I wish I had more time. The utter chaos I could cause these two human beings on a daily basis sends shivers down my testis. The good shiver too like the one your feel when you drive your car over the peak of a hilly road, not the kind you get when you jump into a tank full of cold shrimp. We’ve all been there am I right? Anyways, these eerily hot and yet horribly disgusting pics of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were taken on the beaches of Cabo San Lucas. But the only thing more amazing than Heidi’s tits and ass are the amount of opportunities the two have to be killed…by me. It’s like shooting fish in a barrel, or robbing your grandma’s antique shop around the corner. I told you G-ma, you better upgrade that security or I’m going to continue to steel sh#t. Just saying. I can’t stop myself.

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Darby Gunpowder:
In the spirit of Christmas, missing socks, and spreading rumors: Janet Jackson is pregnant with Jermaine Dupri according to Hollyscoop. This news makes me pregnant with indifference. Stay tuned! Or Don’t!

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Bob ‘The Bitch’:
OK, Kate Winslet. Well played. You finally made me eat my words. I swore that despite being a good actor I would never view you any differently than a beached whale or Jabba the Hut whorfing down a cheeseburger. I mean sure you would’ve made a great hockey goalie but as for being viewed as a sex symbol I don’t think it was ever in the cards. I’d sooner declare myself the well-hung prince of Persia who loves the outdoors and people rather than I would’ve called you hot. But hear it is, Kate, I’m sorry. You finally don’t look like a giant water tank full of Silly Puddy. You look hot. I don’t know if this was just a personal decision or if Hollywood finally said they were tired of putting you in movies where the lead female was supposed to be NOT fat; whatever it was, mission accomplished. And for those of you who are actually wondering where these photos of Kate were taken it was at the New York premiere of her new film The Reader last night. Touche, Kate. Point you.

Comments (4)

Denise Milani is unfairly hot (doubleviking)
Tips on how to build the coolest snowman ever (asylum)
Maria Swan claims her RACK is real, what do you think? (bustedcoverage)
Valentina Dessi’s funbag are insane (hottestgirlsofmyspace)
The sexiest woman in the world you DON’T KNOW (uncoached)
Girls that a better than you and know it (donchavez)
Santa’s sexy helpers (on205th)
Tom Cruise photos BEFORE he was Tom Cruise (agentbedhead)
Jessica Simpson rack never hotter (celebwarship)

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John:
It’s sure is cold in November. Jennifer Anison released a calendar for reasons I cannot fathom. The irony is that photo is the only good one in the bunch. I refuse to even put them in our gallery they are so bad. Click here for proof if you don’t believe me.
Basically, I’m saying you should order the calendar and make every month November. Do that, and you’re gonna get your money’s worth.

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