Derober

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Photo courtesy of inthelights.com

Not that anyone really cares, but the ‘Reality Show” The Hills is scripted. Allow me to clarify: the characters follow a contrived plot by acting out scenes with written dialogue. Yes, it’s true, we have been bamboozled by these amazing “actors”. We always thought the heavy thumb of MTV persuaded the storyline, but according to a spectator fortunate enough to be present during a restaurant scene at Da Silvano, in NYC, claims,

“It was clear that this show is not a reality show. They took five takes of Lauren ordering dinner. The film crew took over the outside eating area by setting up lights and cameras everywhere. They should go back to California.”

It’s a sad day…aaaaannnnd I’m over it.

more at twiigs.com…

 

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Photo courtesy of enews.com

At the 2007 Emmies, Ellen Pompeo displayed her secret to keeping such a slender figure–she conjures lightning bolts straight into her ass. She looks creepy though. I mean have you seen that hair? It’s like a cross between Beethoven, Amadeus, and Marve from the ‘Home Alone’ series. Just awkward.

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Photo courtesy of enews.com

And Death took notice. That’s right, the sunniest smile in the world hosted the 2007 Emmies last night and we couldn’t help but take our finger and jam it as far down our throats to purge ourselves of this hay nous act. I mean while we’re at it why don’t we have Whoopi Goldberg host the Academy Awards…oh, she did that? Oh, what the Hell is the world coming too. I might have to jam two more fingers into my eye-sockets cause this shit crazy.

In recent light of the massive shout out Ryan Seacrest gave to our website on E! News, I would like to say that Mr. Seacrest is one of the few great talents working in Hollywood today. And though nothing says ‘I love you’ like the shadow of Death trailing you, I would like to point out that I’ve always been fond of the Grim Reaper. In fact, that was my Halloween costume 5 years straight…all those many years ago. Thanks Ryan, you’re a true professional. And on a side note, I loved you in Knocked Up.

more at twiigs.com…

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…however, Derober’s X-Ray machines begs to differ.