Madonna and A-Rod shop for $60 Mil mansions…whatever

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Madonna and her glorified chew toy Alex Rodriguez are keeping their affair relationship quiet which is why they spent the week in New York shopping for 60 million dollar homes (as you may have gathered by this point). According to pagesix:
A knowledgeable real estate source tells us the kabbalah-crazed pop queen and the skirt-chasing power hitter are “discreetly looking at properties between Fifth and Park avenues, from just above 60th Street through the 80s.
“Madonna personally came to look at one house a couple of months ago, and Alex has been looking recently,” the insider said. “We’re talking about private, double-width mansions in the vicinity of $30 million to $60 million.”
Madge and A-Rod are also interested in scoring a house “with a garage that you can drive into for additional privacy – although those are rare and hard to come by,” our spy added. Another source said they were also looking in the Hamptons.

I know Madonna is rich and famous, A-Rod. But if you want to experience the sensation only the Madge can give then I suggest sticking your nuts into the blades of a lawn mower or dipping them into cement and then having someone wreck them with a sledge hammer. Much safer alternatives. I wish you all the best, A-Rod, you f#cking idiot.

A-Rod and Madonna reunite…eeew

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
In case you hadn’t heard A-Rod is single again. And if you’re one of the richest and most well known playboy athletes in the world what’s the first thing you do? Think about it for a second, I’ll wait. If you answered shower strippers with cash and drink your self in to a incoherent stupor then you’re like me. However, if you’re Alex Rodriguez then you rushed right back to your old fling He-Man Madonna. According to Us Magazine the two were spotted together fueling rumors that their affair isn’t over.

Madonna and New York Yankee Alex Rodriguez took in a cozy dinner for two at Dos Caminos Third Avenue on Tuesday, a source told Usmagazine.com.
They pair ate at an alcove-like table in the back.
“They seemed very close,” a source told Usmagazine.com.

Now, whether the pair is officially back together has yet to be confirmed. But what can be confirmed by Derober is that Madonna is trying to catch and kill John Conner. She has been on the prowl for the last several months and is intent upon bringing an end to all mankind. Don’t believe me? Why not…it’s f@#king Madonna people.

For more proof click here.

A-Rod’s wife is to sound investment what Paris Hilton is to wholesome virgin

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a hundred times, after cheating on your wife with ANY other woman always always cancel their credit cards the following morning. I call this tactic the ‘fire then expire rule of two’. Alex Rodriguez needs to take a page from my grand pappy Winston’s book of bad beats and never get married again.
Apparently after discovering that Madonna had allegedly knocked boots with her man, Cynthia Rodruguez took action by blowing a HUNDRED GRAND of his money (probably on makeup and pop-rocks) and cozied up to Lenny Kravits–all BEFORE filing for divorce. And I must admit I have no sympathy for you A-Rod.
Marriage Alex? What’s in it for you? So you can point to some dame and say, “That’s my wife, public. I am a real and descent human, so embrace me for all my semblances to you.” Ra ra, how bout you tote a big-boy stick and man up to the fact that you will never be anything like the average man. You’re a rock star. A gozillionaire. Why should you give a damn about what the public thinks. If I were you I’d take baths every day with scores of prostitutes in a tub full of money and pure pogs in my glass enclosed porch. That way the public could see just inhumane and indecent I really am. After all, if you don’t care about anyone else’s opinion then you’ve achieved something only a rare few have–God-like status. I wish you all the best in the future, A-Tard.