Derober

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John:
Anna Kournikova poses for this months issue of Maxim. I’m a natural born boob guy myself. But times are a changin’ and by that I mean I’m not a boob guy anymore. I wanna’ fall asleep on that ass. I want to take that ass out to dinner just to watch it make other asses jealous. I wanna ass-motorboat, ass-punch, and then ass-train it for the Olympics (to win the all around in ass.)

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Bob ‘The Bitch’:
While running Nautica’s SouthBeach Triathalon yesterday, Anna Kournikova looked like a beaten Ethiopian child. Seriously Anna, stop the race and head straight to the nearest Dunkin’ Donuts. I don’t know if you’re angry at your parents, or the society, or just at men in general but quit the charade. It is not empowering for a woman to do this to herself. It’s just a shame. If the good lord graced me with a rocking body like yours I wouldn’t run. I’d sit at home and make sex video tapes of myself all day. And if that’s not the American dream then my Uncle Jeb lied. But nobody I ever knew would dare call that alcoholic a liar. Not Uncle Jeb.

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