Derober

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

John:
Ashlee Simpson took the milk puppies out to dinner with Wentz Bag last night. Pete is really enjoying himself right now I’ll bet. Just wait though, Pete my boy. Soon, Ashtray’s body will grow proportional to the massive mammaries and vacation over. It’s like when a really cute puppy gets all big and you just don’t love it as much as you used to when it was tiny but with big tits and….I’m getting a little lost here.

Update: These 2 clowns are getting married next week!

Update 2: The rumor mill is buzzing with whispers of cheating! Who? When? Where? More to come!

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~Roll mouse over photo to derobe ~

John:
Derober is in no position to confirm this rumor right now but we are hearing chatter from people we know well that ‘ol Ashlee might not be as enamored with the Wentz-Bag as it appears. Apparently, there are some pictures of Ashlee with another man lookin’ real cheat-like taken a year ago. If we get these photos we are going to publish the crap out of ’em. Until then, stay calm and tip your waiter.

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Though it hasn’t been confirmed by Ashlee Simpson’s publicist (yet), x17online.com along with about the entire internet are reporting that Ash is pregnant. And not with power this time but with an actual baby. I’ve already begun to pick out a few names for the happy baby, so here goes:
For Boy
-Bag O. Wentz Jr.
-15 minutes
-Son Ova Bitch
-Jeffrey Dahmer…Wentz
-Damien Wentz
If Girl
-Ashtray Simpson
-Investment 1
-Little shop of Horrors Simpson
-Ashlee N. IQ Jr.–And By N. I mean No….because she’s retarded
-Space Taker Simpson

Any suggestions from the Peanut gallery???

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

John:
Is that Ashlee Simpson at the Kids Choice awards or Sarah Michelle Gellar’s bastard cousin? ‘Ashlee’ did begin all her red carpet interviews with the phrase, “People of earth” which gives me a good hint. These stars are getting a lot carried away here. Miley Cyrus looks like my 27 year-old slut girlfriend. Sorry Slut Girlfriend, but I’m trying to drive a point home.

~ Keep Rolling ~

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
A great drunk man once told me, “when in doubt always double down.” So when you see the opportunity to ridicule two talentless bags of retard like Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz at once, you have no choice but to seize the moment. And if you don’t believe me just click here to see the infamous video of the two laughing about Hurricane Katrina and the crisis in Africa. It’s 100% real, and it will test your gag reflexes so be sure to watch on an empty stomach. Good luck, and Godspeed.