David Blaine sets new record and I finally cut my finger nails

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Well, well, boy wonder David Blaine set another new record. This time he held his breath under water longer than anyone else. His time was 17 minutes and 4 seconds, just about a minute shy of my goal for him which was that he drown. However, the record might just be bogus. Before he went into the tank Blaine inhaled air through an oxygen tank which helped to flush out all the carbon dioxide in his system thus helping him to breath longer. And I say booo. That’s like taking steroids to train before the big track meet. Or in David’s case, it’s like taking cool pills to avoid being a such a douche. Either way, I hate him. You’re no martyr, David. You’re just a moron.

For more on the douchetacular one.

David Blaine attempts to break another worthless record

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Everyone’s favorite ass-tastic media whore magician, David Blaine, is back to his same shtick again–breaking records that don’t need to be broken. This time he’s trying to break the world’s record for ‘holding one’s breath underwater without taking a breath’. And the ribbon on this worthless present is that it is to be presented LIVE on the Oprah Winfrey show (HALLELUJAH!). The record is to beat is 16 minutes and 14 seconds underwater without air. My only question is if I was to urinate in Blaine’s little aquatic bubble while he was in it, how long would he go on until he realized that he brought it on himself? In other words, would he realize just how doucherageous he is via my warm pee stream??
To see more of David’s idiot friend magicians click here.