Future looking bright for Reese.

~Roll mouse over photo to derobe~

John says:
We go behind the scenes as Reese Witherspoon poses for Avon’s new Global Ambassador campaign. Reese is putting the past behind her and looking damn good. I didn’t know that Avon, a beauty corporation, had the clout to name somebody a ‘Global Ambassador’. Hold on. Just in to the Derober world headquarters: Bob the Bitch has been named Rosco’s Fried Chicken’s Global Ambassador. He’ll be parading around the globe advertising the health benefits of fried chicken for the 21st century. Congratulations Bob and Reese, we couldn’t think of anybody more qualified for these bullshit positions.

Bob ‘The Bitch’ says:
Hey there’s nothing bullshit about fried Chicken, or Reese.

Who should continue having sex with Reese?

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~


Photos courtesy of www.sawf.org and www.bbc.co.uk
Damnit, why does Reese Witherspoon have to be so damn adorable? We’d love to hate her…but we can’t. So instead, we’ll figure out which of her suiters to hate: Jake or Ryan? Reese personally contacted Derober and said,

“I can’t decide which dream guy I want to be with, can ya’ll just take a vote to decide for me?”

Derober talks back,

“Yes, but what do we get in return Reesey?”

Her response,

“My S&M sex-tape library complete with ball-gags, whips, hog-ties, Ryan, Jake, jumper cables, and a mystery man wearing a leather face mask named, Machine.”

Offer accepted. Commence Voting! (video coming soon)