Marisa Miller -vs- Heidi Klum: A Battle of the Titans

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The old guard verse the new guard: Marisa Miller and Heidi Klum. Both will go down in history as two of the hottest, most perfect women to ever walk the earth. But, who’s hotter? Who’s the 11 and who’s the 10.5? Today we will crown the winner based on a concrete facts and mostly subjective bullshit. Let the games begin..

Who has graced the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition cover more times?

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Marisa Miller SI Covers:
1 Cover shot and 7 appearances

Heidi Klum SI Covers:
1.15 Cover shots and 7 appearances

Although each goddess was featured on one Si Swimsuit cover each, Heidi Klum weaseled her way onto 2 covers with a tiny thumbnail photo. Ironically, the photo is on Marisa Miller’s cover!

Verdict: The win goes to Heidi on a technicality. If we were judging by sexiness, it would be a landslide victory for Marisa who is wearing skimpy bikini bottoms with no top while Heidi is wearing an F’ing one piece. Really Heidi? A one piece?!?!?
Continue Reading: Marisa Miller -vs- Heidi Klum: A Battle of the Titans

Marissa Miller should come with a warning label

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Darby Gunpowder:
Thank God I’m in good heart health because these photos of Marissa Miller could be dangerous. My future wife posed in Complex magazine this month and looked flawless as usual. Some of the pics look like she’s in a dungeon or some sort of underground bomb shelter. Looks like someone beat me to my master kidnapping plan.

There are no words for this

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John:
Marisa Miller is so pro I don’t even know where to start. I’m beside myself.

For the entire pictorial (and it’s sick), click here.

Brooke Hogan would be hot if she was Marissa Miller

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Darby Gunpowder:
Brooke Hogan is the epitome of Wal-Mart-Hot. She has obviously surrounded herself with ass-sucking “Yes People” which gives her a false sense if hotness. It’s probably the same people who tell Mary-Kate she’s a perfect size. For the record, this is my first and last post about Brooke Hogan because I cannot contribute to her pseudo-fame any longer.

Marisa Miller has made some wise decisions in her time

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Bob ‘The Bitch’
Marisa Miller roles with good company. As I made evident in my tell all book 5 Ways to Woo Marisa Miller, Marisa and I are happily dating. Or I guess you could say we are more friends with benefits. Whatever you want to call our relationship is semantics anyways–I rock…she rolls…we f@ck 3 times a day and 4 times on Sundays. And as a woman of class it should come as no surprise that Marisa has done a ‘proper’ topless/bottomless spread for the August issue of GQ magazine. And in a related story, there has been a startling increase of men who’ve developed carpal tunnel syndrome since the spread’s release. And all I can say is look but don’t touch fellas. Ol’ Rusty the sawed-off shotgun is always waiting close by my side.