Derober

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

John:
Paris Hilton is shooting a video today and she looks great. And by ‘great’ I mean ‘idiotic’. If it wasn’t for the butlers, Paris wouldn’t know how to dress herself I’m guessing. If she thinks she can get by on her smoking hot looks and heiress fortune, she’s got another thing coming.

Life isn’t that easy.

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

John:
Paris Hilton is still at the beach in Hawaii. We don’t know if she has slept or gone inside. We will fill you in if this happens although it seems unlikely. We don’t know why we don’t like Paris. It’s not her false sense of entitlement or the fact that she thinks a gallon of milk costs $58. When we pinpoint the hatred we’ll let you know.

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
I know what you’re all thinking. This photo rocks. It does so little yet says so much. It’s as if I summed up Paris’ entire life in one derobing. Your welcome internet. Look at her. You’re looking at woman that would auction off an entire village of Rwandan children if she thought it could get her a new pair of Dior sunglasses. But lets not kid ourselves, Paris doesn’t need the money. It’s more likely she would eat the Rwandan kids for a little PR. I can see the add now for her bid to be the next president of the United States. Rwandan cannibal, or presidential hopeful?? You decide.

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Paris Hilton’s juggs are like the mutant villain Mystique. They’re in a constant state of change–like the weather. I don’t know what she stuffs her bra with but my guess is either a tuba or a bag of Tonka trucks. Either way, they’re about as legit as the statement that ‘I HAD SEX with Megan Fox last week.’ And if you believe that I don’t blame you. I often wonder why wouldn’t the world’s hottest girl have sex with the world’s most eligible bachelor 25 years running. God I’m depressed. DIET COKE!!!

~ Roll mouse over photo to Derobe ~

John:
Paris Hilton went clubbing last night as some sort of depressed ballerina. Last week I tried to nickname her ‘the world owes me everything’ but it didn’t stick. So I’m trying it again…
The World Owes Me Everything went clubbing last night as some sort of depressed ballerina. ‘World’ was reportedly distraught over a recent caviar purchase-gone-awry. ‘World’ decided to leave all her troubles behind by going some fancy LA club. ‘World’ entered the club and promptly announced to the room. “I’m here. Now give me everything.”