Derober

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Photo courtesy of x17online.com.

Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Walking the mean streets of NYC took on a whole new meaning today for Paris Hilton. But thanks to her new Real-D glasses she got to see her own death 3D. Who could ask for more?

Ok, I know I know, we all want to see the follow-up to this photo in a month where Tyrone-Rex shits out the remains of Paris. But I’m just one man, people. I only have two hands, and one of em is busy right now.

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A. 3340 CLERENDON RD, BEVERLY HILLS CA 90210
Click Here for directions

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Owner: Paris Hilton
Price: $5,664,000
Location: 3340 Clerendon Road, Beverly Hills, CA 90210
Size: 7,493 square feet
Bedrooms: 5
Bathrooms: 5.5
Empty Souls: 1 + guest

Poor Paris was forced to move into this retarded Beverly hills mansion because she had no privacy at her West Hollywood pad.
For some reason Derober feels obligated to reveal her new home address -oh and how to get there.

View interior photos of Paris’s mansion after the jump Continue Reading: Q. Where does Paris Hilton live?

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John:
Paris Hilton went to a screening of The Hottie & The Nottie at The Brenden Theatres in The Palms Casino Resort and at least she can make fun of herself. We’re told that a few people did show up but when they realized it was Hottie instead of Cloverfield, they bailed.

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Users on IMDB.com (Internet Movie Database) voted Paris Hilton’s new film, The Hottie and the Nottie, “The Worst Movie of All Time.” Wow. That’s almost impressive. Not just the worst movie of the year, or decade, or 21st century -all-f@#*king-time. Somewhere, J-Lo is sipping champagne and watching Gigli on repeat.

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Dee: Has anyone noticed that Paris Hilton DIDN’T get laid at the Grammy’s the other night. According to Pagesix.com, Paris tried her damndest to hook up with uber-guitar-hottie John Mayer, but to no avail. Pagesix reports Paris,

“aggressively tried to hook up with John Mayer - following him around and dancing, trying to get him to look at her…at one point, she sat at a table and tapped on the seat to motion him to sit next to her. John politely sat for less than a second before ignoring her and moving to chat with a group of friends.”    

John, let me be the first to say your music…ehhh…never hit home with me. BUT after publicly making Paris Hilton your bitch I will stand in line and vote Mayer for President in the upcoming election. Congrats for being the first public Paris denial of the new year. Hopefully the first of many. 

Bob ‘The Bitch’: Yes, this is all well and good but more importantly has anyone seen my toothbrush?? I left it out last night and I swear, Derober John, if you used it…I mean, come the F@#% on! That’s not cool, and it certainly isn’t hygienic. For the last time, my brush is always the one on the far left! Stay away from the brush on the far left!! Now I have to make a run to the store. Oh yeah, and horaay John Mayer. Probably never has his toothbrush stolen.

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