Derober

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John:
Robin Wright and Sean Penn recently asked a judge to dismiss their divorce and the judge granted it. The two were spotted at an Eddie Vedder concert last night. Sean got up on stage and dedicated a song to his rekindled flame. We’re not sure what the song was but we have a few guesses.
Nookie - Limp Bizkit
Just one of my hoes - 334 Mobb
F*** her Gently - Tenacious D
Hoe’s in my room - Ludacris
Sorry about screwing all those hookers. My bad -Derober’s original score

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Out of work, but not out of ideas, actor Lindsay Lohan has really begun to get desperate. In her upcoming $75,000 role as a nymphomaniac waitress (that’s a stretch) in the Indie film Florence, Lohan offered to give up the goods. Or to the laymen, she offered to show full frontal nudity in hopes of rekindling the flame that was once a career. But the producers had other ideas. Softpedia reports:

She just wants to remind people that she can act and she’s worth hiring.” Also, the source reports that although the script only requires LiLo to show her boobs, she offered to go all the way down and strip completely. “She said it would be no problem to go Full Monty,” added the insider. Thankfully, the producers refused to go along with her very helpful offer.

Wow. That’s a new low. When the producers are telling a woman to keep their clothes on you know there’s something really f#%^ed up with that person. Enter Lindsay Lohan. She’ll make you an offer you CAN refuse. Lohan never should have done that Marilyn Monroe topless shoot. It took away that crazy curiosity that all men shared and replaced it with a lackluster, “Ehhh.”

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Darby Gunpowder:
Suri Cruise has been MIA for the past few weeks, so we obviously thought she fell down a wishing well. This is not the case. Thank Zenu!
Tom brought his confused miniature-Katie to a public park to play and ensure the general public that she was indeed a functioning mammal. However, Suri did not talk or play with “The Others” nor did she show any emotion during the outing. She was seen talking to lamp post, an electrical box and a trash can. Sparks were seen when she went down the metal slide and the only words she spoke to daddy were “oil-can” through clinched jaws. Sounds status quo to me.

Click HERE to see a photo of Suri’s dad impersonating Adolph Hitler (don’t forget to roll your mouse over the photo!)

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Darby Gunpowder:
Jessica Simpson remade the classic Esquire cover a’la Virna Lisi shaving her face. All you need to know is that it’s hot and bloody steamy. It looks like she’s back to her fighting weight which is good because I can’t fantasize about skelotor on my best day.
Enjoy the pics and make sure to click on the thumbs to see the slightest of nip slips. Disclaimer: For trained eyes only.

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