Paris Hilton eats sh*t

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Darby Gunpowder:
Paris Hilton tripped and fell right on her over-rated face in Prague over the weekend as paparazzi chased her and her dog-named boyfriend Banji. YAHTZEE!
When you’re Paris Hilton and you trip and fall down, it’s news. In my book, if anyone falls down it should be news. Watching people fall down is the worlds guiltiest pleasure and my greatest pastime. I LOVE IT. I would be the most miserable person in the world without the spontaneous effects of gravity. If only the world were made of ice staircases or oils slicks….well here’s to wishing.

Check out these never seen before photos of Paris falling down on many other occasions. Just brutally awesome!

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Ride the painted pony, let the spinning wheel spin. It’s Britney Bitch.

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Dee:
Let’s be clear, I have no idea what riding the painted pony means, but I’m pretty sure it’s an appropriate title. Britney Spears has been released from her temporary asylum. The first thing she did was hop in her new Mercedes and pick up a paparazzi friend. Together they led a circus of paps on a chase which ended at the Beverly Hills Hotel. There were so many photographers, the police had to break it up.
John:
Driving rough shot around town and staying at the Beverly Hills Hotel with a paparazzi pal? Does this sound familiar to anybody? Britney is not better ya’ll. A few days rest in a mental carwash doesn’t get all the dirt out. TMZ actually set up a camera for hours which did nothing but film the guard gate at The Summit where Britney lives. Not exactly must-see TV.

As you all know, the Derobers took a trip inside the gate just a couple days ago to leave Britney a get well gift for her return. Now THAT is a must-see!

Here is the new HD version we just posted. The password is Blue Lollipop.

Britney really needs more attention

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Dee:
As everyone knows by now Britney Spears has been committed to the insane asylum UCLA Medical Center. And here are some of the grim details of what her stay will entail according to x17online.
According to the source:

# Britney will be held for at least 72 hours, and up to 14 days if the LA County officer deems her a danger to herself and others.

# Britney will be supervised around the clock by nurses and security, unable to even bathe by herself.

# Over the first few days, Britney will be encouraged to sleep as much as possible, and will be administered sleeping pills, as well as Ativan (an anti-anxiety medication) to help her do so. Meds are doled out three times a day.

# Visitors are allowed to come one hour a day during the week, between 6:30 and 7:30, but on the weekends the stay is extended from 1-3. Visitors are allowed to bring food (although our source says UCLA’s food is pretty decent!) but they cannot keep it or any other contraband (sharp objects, razors, etc.) in their rooms.
Continue Reading: Britney really needs more attention

Britney Spears is falling down.

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Dee:
Surrounded by clingers-on and paparazzi, Britney Spears is unraveling… and she’s doing it in public. Advice? Hmph. A reporter once asked Bette Davis to dispense some advice for aspiring actresses coming to Hollywood. She thought about it for a second and said, “Always take Fountain.” More profound words were never uttered. Unfortunately, that advice is f*#^ing useless here.

Keith Urban in motorcycle accident. Blames paparazzi.

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Leo Says:
Keith Urban was on his way to an AA meeting in Sydney this Sunday when he noticed he was being followed by paparazzi. Urban is normally pretty nice to the guys but was not happy about the circumstances of being followed to an AA meeting. Urban sped up, fish-tailed, and let go of the bike. The photographer stopped to help Keith and did not take any pictures. Keith is just fine.

John Says:
Keith should learn to ride a bike. Why didn’t he just pull over and talk to the guy. Instead he wanted to be a hero. Glad he’s not hurt. Now you can go home and drink it off.