Derober

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John:
David Duchovny, the man I aspire to be, has checked himself into sex-hab says People,

“I have voluntarily entered a facility for the treatment of sex addiction,” the actor says in an exclusive statement. “I ask for respect and privacy for my wife and children as we deal with this situation as a family.” Duchovny, 48, has been married to actress Téa Leoni since 1997. They have two children, daughter Madelaine West, 9, and son Kyd, 6.”

David Duchovny is the best at everything so I’m sure he was the best sexoholic ever. I’ll bet he’s gonna’ tear that rehab center a new one too with his untoppable member. They’re gonna’ talk about him long after he’s gone. One hot nurse will say to the other one,

“Remember when David was here? I have to confess - wait, no! You too, Stacy?! Wow. F*cking Wow!”

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Bob ‘The Bitch’:
Derober’s winner of the 2007 ‘Ugliest woman alive’ award, Amy Winehouse is back in the news for headbutting people while in a drunken stupor. Seriously. It all went down last night as The Sun reports:

Onlookers told how the married singer also SNOGGED a mystery fella at a nightspot and shocked punters by overturning tables and drinks.
She was later seen smoking drugs in the street, walked into a lamppost, and riled a cabbie by paying only HALF her promised fare home.

Amy then realized that she hadn’t met her ‘destruction quota’ for the night and thus decided to head to another bar.

She was off her face, throwing drinks around and turning over tables. Amy screamed, ‘I am a legend, get these people out. I want to take drugs’.”
Another man tried to get her a cab, but she reportedly thought he was trying to molest her and allegedly butted him in the face.

She also headbutted another man while at the bar when he refused to let her play pool before she went home. But when you’re the ‘ugliest woman alive’ you have nowhere to go but up so a drunken headbutting rampage almost improves your image. A few more nights like that and she might actually be able to shake peoples hands in broad daylight.

For more evidence of Amy’s insanity.

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Photo courtesy of pagesix.com.
Bob ‘The Bitch’:
We spotted Nicky Hilton shopping yesterday at Christian Louboutin store in L.A., and all we can say is ‘Wow’. Are you kidding me? There is a Hilton girl with more problems than Paris? That’s like telling the victims of Nagasaki, “At least you’re not Hiroshima.” Or telling an AIDS infected person, “At least you weren’t the carrier.” But in all seriousness, anorexia is awful and disgusting. So Nicky, from the bottom of my heart, eat your sister.

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According to Star Magazine, Adnan is bragging to his friends that he knocked Britney up and is set for life.

“Britney is Adnan’s dream come true. He knows that if he has a child with Brit, he’ll be made for life,” one friend of Adnan’s tells Star.”

Wow, the world’s shittiest mom is going to have another baby. That’s like allowing OJ Simpson to get married again and we all know that story ends. In other news, Britney’s parents are on the verge of suicide.

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Photo courtesy of wwtdd.com

Dee:
I’m looking at this and the only thing I think is, “Who was taking these photos?” Did they grab a friend and ask her to take some “real low quality, gritty shit.” This is the kind of white trash behavior I’d expect to see at a Six Flags theme park, not Santa Monica. Frankly, they both look like they could use some vitamin C.

John:
Yes, this is disgusting. It looks like it’s difficult for these two to even stand up for long periods of time. As I watch these two conspire about how their going to score some coke, I wonder how long it will be until these two implode like a dying star?
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